


Like Uncut Diamonds

by Miss_Nihilist



Series: Unlike Diamonds, Watches Are Practical [2]
Category: Ben 10 Series
Genre: Angst, Fate & Destiny, Five Years Later, M/M, Minor Original Character(s), Pining, Post-Omniverse, Tags Contain Spoilers, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unrequited Love, Worldbuilding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:34:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23934658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Nihilist/pseuds/Miss_Nihilist
Summary: Rook sat in a cheaply-made plastic chair under the beacon-like Mr. Smoothie mascot, twiddling his thumbs idly. On the table next to him were two untouched smoothies. He sighed as the last of the evening’s patrons gathered up their things and left.Ben was late. Even after so many years, some things never changed.In which the years apart have given both Ben and Rook a lot to reflect on and none of it turns out the way that they expected.
Relationships: Kai Green/Ben Tennyson (mentioned), Rook Blonko/Ben Tennyson
Series: Unlike Diamonds, Watches Are Practical [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1444942
Comments: 36
Kudos: 47





	1. ...but i'm always in love with you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _Technically_ , this fic is a successor to my multi-chapter work, Diamonds Are Forever. You don't have to read that in order to understand this one, all you really have to know is that Ben and Rook aren't partners anymore. However, I highly recommend reading it anyway because it took almost a year of planning and writing, and I'm incredibly proud of myself for finishing it. It's also really good — I promise. (There are some minor spoilers for it in this fic, but nothing that will ruin the experience of reading.)
> 
> Anyway, that fic doesn't get as shippy with Ben and Rook as I wanted, but the narrative had a flow that I liked and I couldn't find a way to fit any romance into it in a way that satisfied me. So, now I give you this.

"Another one?" Rook asked, fighting not to scowl. "There are already fifty processing plants within a five mile radius of this station. They do produce their own waste — it strikes me as counterproductive to resort to that when our goal is to improve the ecosystem as best we can." He didn't say that it was a stupid idea. It was, but Rook was aware of how poorly _that_ would go over.

"You also have a certain quota that we need to be meeting," the bureaucrat that Rook hadn't bothered to remember the name of reminded him. Even for a Galvan she was short, a petite little thing no bigger than Rook's palm. Regardless, she held herself like she was eight feet tall and somehow managed to constantly have an air of looking down at people. "If you don't make more progress, you will start to lose funding. And then where will this planet be?" She sniffed in disdain.

That time, Rook _did_ frown. "We are making plenty of progress. Just because it is not happening as fast as we would like does not mean that there has not been positive change."

The Galvan scowled. "Rook Blonko, you have had jurisdiction on Vulpin for a little over a year now and all you have to show for it is an average temperature increase of three degrees Celsius, a slight change in the color of the sky, and an anecdotal report that there _might_ be a general increase in healthy births among the Vulpimancer population. I don't care how "realistic" my expectations are. Do it _faster_ , or go from fifty processing planets to twenty while we focus our time and money somewhere that will actively benefit from it." She stepped up onto the small hover pad that she used to get around, rising into the air so that she was _actually_ looking down at Rook. He stared back, expression carefully blank. "You have a month to deliver better numbers in your report," she said. "Do _not_ make me come back here and repeat myself. If I never step foot on this planet again, it will be too soon."

Rook nodded politely as he stood. "Of course. Allow me to escort you back to your ship." He walked over to the door and unlocked it, gesturing her forward.

As well as he hid it, Rook couldn't help but be annoyed. He had spent most of his day showing that woman around Vulpin, highlighting all that he could of the progress they had made, only to be told that it wasn't good enough. What was he supposed to do? He couldn't abandon the planet while it was still in the condition that it was in, but his superiors might not give him a choice.

In the base's hanger, the Galvan woman got on her ship. Rook waved towards the command center and they opened the airlock for her without issue. Only once the heavy metal door closed behind her did Rook allow himself to relax. His shoulders slumped as he swallowed a sigh. They were asking for the impossible... not that Rook wasn't used to it.

He left the hanger, pausing in the sky bridge that led to the main part of the base. The floor beneath him was solid steel and the glass walls were a foot thick but Rook could still smell the filth outside. When he first arrived on Vulpin, the garbage had been seven feet deep at its thinnest and the air was so toxic that they had been forced to set up a temporary base on its largest moon, lest the chemicals choking out the sky dissolve through their compound walls. The fact that Rook could even be in a base on Vulpin — a planet considered unfit to host most forms of life for nearly ten thousand years — was a true testament to how far their cleaning efforts were going. He could go on the roof, throw a rock in any direction, and hit some sort of cleaning facility. But that wasn't enough for the politicians who needed Vulpin to look good so that _they_ looked good.

As a cadet, Rook hadn't had any problem with the Plumbers accepting funding and donations from political figures. They needed to get their own money somehow, didn't they? Then again, Rook had never been the one dealing with their mind-numbingly asinine orders before, either.

"Excuse me, Brigage Rook," a female voice interrupted his thoughts. He turned, acknowledging the Uxorite's salute with a nod. Only then did she continue. "You have a meeting in conference room three in fifteen minutes. The Plumber ambassadors you sent to get in touch with the closest Vulpimancer settlement are impatient to give you their results."

Right. Rook had forgotten about that meeting. He swallowed a tired groan. He had only been awake for two hours and he was already exhausted. How many tasks had he scheduled for himself?

"Thank you, Twi'leks. I will head there soon," Rook said with a stiff smile. He turned to fully face the Uxorite.

As a well-respected Magister, Twi'leks Lekku had quickly earned her way into Rook's good graces. She was his unofficial right-hand man and, without her constantly shoving Rook from point A to point B, he was certain that he would never get anywhere on time. Not with his attention being pulled in a thousand different directions.

Twi'leks returned his smile, but he could tell by the way her tail was twitching that her joy was less than skin deep. "It went better than the last communications attempt. You know how Vulpimancers are — slow to trust, especially when it comes to outsiders." She grimaced, tentacles curling in disgust as she glanced out the window. "Not that we've given them much reason to be welcoming."

Absently following her gaze, Rook nodded. Vulpin had served as the galaxy's dumping ground for toxic and hazardous materials for as long as anyone could remember. The radiation had mutated the Vulpimancers, even after they took to living underground to survive, and killed off everything except a few subspecies of insects and a handful of different algae. The groundwater was unsafe and contaminated, but on the surface, it was either non-existent or it reeked of sulfur and was blacker than tar.

When Rook stayed silent and unmoving, Twi'leks sighed. "You're drifting away to dreamland again, Brigage," she teased. That garnered no reaction. There was a pause and then, quietly, "You're thinking about him again, aren't you?"

 _That_ got Rook's attention. He winced as though burned, giving Twi'leks a side glance. "...Is it that obvious?" He muttered.

She smiled reassuringly. They weren't close on a personal level — Rook's fault, for never wanting to risk it — but they'd worked together long enough that he didn't feel uncomfortable when Twi'leks set a hand on his arm. "Only because I'm used to it. You don't do a good job of keeping secrets, Brigage. You're always tensing up when someone says his name and you daydream the most when you're near windows." Her eyes flicked back out to the ugly scenery, smile falling. "Is it all the green? Strange that you would choose to be in a place devoid of any other color."

The comment was odd to Rook — not because she was wrong about windows, but because he had never once associated the scenery of Vulpin with Ben. It wasn't much of a comparison. Both things made Rook's stomach twist, but for completely different reasons. Everything outside of the Plumber base was a sickly shade of green, ranging from the pale yellow color of bruises to the near-black of the smog-choked clouds. The green of Ben's eyes was deep and rich, the color of summer grass. When he smiled, it could make his eyes light up brighter than the Omnitrix could ever hope to glow.

With a scowl, Rook shook the thought away and turned from the window. "The green is not what reminds me of him," he admitted. "It is because when I look out the window, I see the sky. The atmosphere is such that I cannot see the stars, but…" He shifted and sighed. "It reminds me of the difference in constellations between Earth and Revonnah. That even though we may see the same stars, he will have a vastly different view. Assuming that he has enough spare time to admire the night sky, at least." Without looking at Twi'leks, Rook started walking. Conference room three was one floor up, down the main hall and on the left. "And for the record, I took this job specifically because it is as far away from Earth as I can get without leaving the galaxy. I would appreciate it if you would not remind me of him," he said evenly. Rook already spent more than enough time thinking about Ben — he didn't need more of it.

A part of him regretted ever telling Twi'leks about Ben in the first place. She had heard about the Hero of the Universe, of course, but Rook had swept his reputation as "Ben Tennyson's ex-partner" under the rug long before his promotion from Magister to Brigage, not that it was easy. Rook had confided his feelings in her during a moment of emotional weakness, which was his own mistake.

At her heart, Rook knew that Twi'leks was a kind person, unlike the majority of her species. He would be hearing about the incident later but, for the time being, Rook was grateful when all she did was nod and trail behind him to his next meeting. He had more than enough to worry about without adding Ben to that list.

Unfortunately, the silence didn't last. Twi'leks cleared her throat as soon as they'd left the sky bridge and were heading toward the stairs. "You're stacking up a large number of vacation days, Brigage. Maybe you should consider taking a few days off work."

Impatient and frustrated, Rook shot her a hard look. "I thought that I made my opinion on the subject _clear_ —"

"It's not about Earth!" Twi'leks held her hands up in surrender. "In a general sense, you can't deny that you're stressed. A visit home to Revonnah might do you some good. Didn't you mention that your sister was recently engaged? You ought to stop by and congratulate her."

Almost begrudgingly, Rook let his anger ebb away. "I have been considering it," he said slowly, even though it was a complete lie. His superior was starting to pressure him to use up those vacation days, but Rook didn't want to leave Vulpin while it was still in such a fragile state. "I will be able to make it home for Shim's wedding. I see no reason to waste valuable time that could be spent making progress on a frivolous home visit."

He thought that that settled it when Twi'leks didn't reply. But then her footfalls stopped too. Rook turned to look, confused, to find her standing in the middle of the hallway and gazing at him with an unreadable expression.

They were wasting time. Rook was going to be late for his meeting. Nonetheless, he arched an eyebrow. "What is it?"

She shook her head. "When I started working for you, you used to say that nothing was more important than your family. But that was back when you weren't a coward, afraid to even hear the name _Ben_."

And, sure enough, Rook had to look away. In her voice, Ben's name sounded sharp as a whip and foreign. He'd done everything that he could to avoid saying that name aloud, not wanting to even hear it. The ease in which Twi'leks let it slip reminded him of painful memories swirling around simpler times.

Somehow, Rook managed to drag his gaze upward to look her in the eye. "It is not that I am being cowardly," he said finally. "I simply do not want to hear it. Is this so important that it cannot wait?"

"No, it can't," Twi'leks replied irritably. She stalked forward, scowling. "And the fact that you think it can says a lot, with very little of it being good. You're only on this miserable planet because you're a _coward_. You've never given Ben a fair chance or asked for his thoughts on the situation. You made that decision for him and now you're miserable because it's not what you wanted. With an attitude like that, what else is there to expect?" She snapped. "You wouldn't be two-hundred thousand lightyears from Earth if you were handling this like a mature adult and you know it. That's why you take it so hard — because all of this upset is _preventable_ and _entirely your fault_."

Silence. Rook wasn't sure if he wanted to punch something or cry. Definitely not cry, but he couldn't go around punching things either, so…

He let out a slow breath, forcing himself to look calm as his tense body language relaxed. "Magister Lekku," Rook said in a detached tone, "I did not ask for your opinion on my personal life. Please refrain from such outbursts in the future by doing your job and keeping out of things that do not concern you."

Twi'leks looked like he'd just slapped her. There was a surge of guilt in his chest that Rook swiftly crushed.

"Yes sir, Brigage," she said stiffly, brushing past him. Rook almost expected a snide remark about Ben, but Twi'leks was nothing if not a professional. "You're going to be late for your meeting if you don't hurry."

He did have to hurry to keep up with her fuming steps, but Rook ended up being late anyway. Not that it mattered. The field team eagerly reported the rising healthy births and declining defects or miscarriages in the Vulpimancer population. The translators needed to be updated, so Rook finally had to call in living experts instead of the machinery they had been using. The Vulpimancer language was incredibly complex, so while the need for professional translators wasn't surprising, it _was_ disheartening. Yet another cost that Rook was assigning to a project already seen as a failure.

He left the meeting with a pounding headache, but there wasn't any time for Rook to relax. His schedule didn't _have_ to be as full as it was, of course. Over the years, though, Rook had discovered that the only sure-fire way to keep himself from thinking about Ben was to cram his schedule so full that he barely had time to think at all.

So Rook let himself get swept up in the day-to-day of being in charge of the restoration of an entire planet. He heard the weekly report from those in charge of water and air quality. Adjustments to their facilities were made accordingly, though most of them were already working at maximum efficiency. The incinerators that they had placed on one of Vulpin's moons needed repairs and Rook had to authorize it, as well as handle the details about why there had been such a large-scale breakdown in the first place. The answer was, obviously, that they were disposing of too much at once and it had triggered a chain reaction. That meant that Rook had to either slow the rate that they burned the trash on Vulpin's surface or put in a request for more incinerators with money in a budget that he didn't have. Corners had to be cut, so Rook ordered that the advanced translators to help them communicate with the Vulpimancers had to be put on hold until further notice. There were so many new workers — Plumbers and grunt laborers alike — arriving every day that their main base needed to be expanded, too. It was yet more money that Rook couldn't afford to spend.

Some days he didn't break to eat, but it was Twi'leks, of all people, who came to make Rook stop working and get something to eat. He could tell that she was still upset about earlier, but she made no mention of Ben or the apology that she was no doubt expecting (and which Rook would not be giving). She made sure that he went all the way to the cafeteria. At that point, it didn't matter if he stayed or if he took the food back to his desk to continue working. So long as Rook ate, Twi'leks wasn't picky.

The whole thing just made Rook more stressed, though. As he moved through the food line, all he could think about was the papers waiting for his signature and the calculations that still needed to be ran and the call that he needed to make to the officer in charge of their budget, to arrange that some assets be moved around.

On his way out with his tray in hand, though, a commotion caught Rook's attention. He didn't want to waste time separating a petty skirmish, but he was the commanding officer and it was his job to ensure that everyone was working together without issue. Eating would have to wait.

Rook held his food in one hand, the other prepared to unholster the Proto-Tool from over his shoulder, should the need arise. It rarely did, but sometimes intense fights required him to use a net or a lasso to put an end to it. He hoped that it didn't come to that.

There was a throng of Plumbers surrounding a table. They parted for Rook once they saw his ranking. At the front of the ground, Rook opened his mouth to demand an explanation, but the words never left his mouth. He almost dropped the tray, tightening his hold on it at the last second. It had been years since he'd had to see that face.

"Shh!" The Plumber at the center of the crowd — the only human on Vulpin, a man that Rook recognized as Officer Turner — shushed everyone, grinning. "No one's going to be able to hear the interview if you're all gossiping."

He set his tablet face-up on the table and pressed play. The still-image of Ben's face that had been paused came to life as he grinned and laughed. The sound of it made Rook's chest constrict. He would have taken a step back if he remembered how.

" _I'm so glad you could join us to answer some questions, Ben,"_ the woman interviewing him said. The subtitles at the bottom of the video were in an alien language that Rook didn't recognize. It must have been a recorded version that someone put up on the extranet. How Officer Turner had managed to get a hold of something like that, all the way out on Vulpin, Rook had no idea. " _I know we've all been very curious about this project you're working on. You said you completed it, though, isn't that right?"_

On screen, Ben nodded. " _Yeah! It just finished construction a few days ago, actually. I wanted it to be a surprise, but I'm glad that I can finally announce it. I've been building my Galactic Headquarters,"_ Ben said proudly. " _Traveling that galaxy has taught me just how much I love Earth, but I'm a hero all across the galaxy. I want an easier way to keep track of everyone who needs my help and a base of operations has been an idea of mine since I was ten!"_

He laughed again and the interviewer joined in. Rook couldn't breathe.

" _I think I speak for everyone — both on Earth and otherwise — when I say that I'm looking forward to seeing what your new base can provide."_ The interviewer winked playfully. She leaned forward in her seat with a coy look. " _But, Ben, there's something else that's been stirring up rumors with your fans and critics alike lately. What's this we hear about a girlfriend?"_ The crowd in whatever studio they were interviewing Ben in murmured in interest. For his part, Ben turned a faint shade of red and said nothing. The interviewer continued. " _You haven't had a public relationship since you dated the world-famous women's tennis player, Julie Yamamoto — who recently made headlines when she claimed victory at Wimbledon — in high school. Do you care to comment?"_ When again, Ben said nothing, the interviewer laughed. " _There's no need to be shy, Ben! There's been gossip for a good month now, not to mention the photos taken by both fans and paparazzi."_

The image of the two of them seated was replaced by several photos that only stayed on screen for a second or so each. Rook wasn't surprised, but somehow it still knocked the breath out of him. There was Ben with Kai Green, clear as day. A photo of them holding hands in a park, enjoying breakfast at a bistro, a closer one where Kai had her hand up to block the camera… It went on and on, it seemed. There were more, probably, that hadn't been shown.

Stuck, Ben let out a nervous laugh. " _I, um… well, I guess we can't keep it a secret anymore,"_ he joked. It was painfully clear that he didn't want to be there. " _Me and Kai have been dating for about a year now."_

The audience broke into applause and the interview whistled. When the noise died down, she leaned right back into Ben, like a vulture vying for the last scrap. " _Is it serious, Ben?"_

Before they could get an answer or even a look at Ben's expression, the video ended. Apparently, that was all that the clip had to offer. The Plumbers still gathered around to get news on the Hero of the Universe groaned in disappointment. There were murmurs around him, no doubt more gossip and rumors, but Rook wasn't listening. He barely noticed the crowd dispersing as he stood there, numb.

He had spent five years of his life trying very, very hard to pretend that he wasn't in love with Ben Tennyson. It was amazing how seeing him speak for less than a minute could destroy all of Rook's hard work.

"Brigage." Twi'leks set a hand on his shoulder. Rook didn't turn, but he could picture the expression on her face: stricken and torn. "You ought to go eat before the lunch hour ends. You need a full stomach to focus on the day ahead."

Some part of Rook understood that she was right, that the work on Vulpan had to be prioritized over anything else he was doing. But he thought of the fond look on Ben's face when he said Kai's name and felt something twist his chest, like a hand had grabbed his lungs and was squeezing until they burst.

"I… Yes. You are right," Rook managed. He hadn't even realized that he was still holding a tray of food and looked down at it with faint surprise. Without looking at Twi'leks, he turned and left the cafeteria.

On the way back to his office, Rook's mind was spinning. Why did he even care? He hadn't seen Ben in five years and hadn't spoken to him in nearly that long. His love life was none of Rook's concern. It didn't matter that he was in love with Ben. Rook wasn't a part of his life anymore. He had willingly separated himself from his ex-partner. After everything that happened between them…

He set his food tray down on his desk with a clatter and Rook sat heavily in his chair. He held his head in his hands, grimacing. After everything that happened, he had considered himself lucky that Ben still wanted to be friends, when he had every right to never speak to Rook again after what he had done.

It had been great, for a little while. While Rook went off of Earth to focus more on climbing the ranks of the Plumbers, Ben had started traveling off-world more. They had called nearly every day when they both had the time and a strong enough connection. But, of course, nothing lasted.

In the back of his mind, Rook was always counting the years. Ben would be twenty-two years old.

Rook was aware that it was his fault. He had been the one to suddenly stop communication. He used the excuse that he was trying to focus more on his studies in the hopes of getting promoted soon, but once he had free time again, Rook hadn't tried to reach out. He had been looking for a reason to shut Ben out ever since their partnership ended and Rook had found one. He knew why, too. Had he never fallen in love with Ben, Rook wouldn't feel the need to separate himself.

He was trying to move on past his feelings by cutting them out, like a tumor. The moment that Rook realized how he felt, he accepted that it was impossible. Ben had never expressed romantic interest in men and, even if he had, they had both seen his future. He was destined to end up with Kai, to marry and have a child. Rook didn't factor in. He had tried so desperately to learn to be okay with that, but…

Ignoring his food, Rook turned to his computer. He knew it would take some digging but, as the highest-ranking Plumber on the planet, Rook had certain benefits that were afforded to him. He connected to the extranet and started searching.

He was aware that he was wasting time that was better spent on work, but Rook couldn't muster up much will to care. He needed to know, just this one thing and he would let it go. Rook would turn back to his assignments and never let himself think about Ben Tennyson again, the way he had been managing for years.

Normally, it was difficult to use the extranet on Vulpin at all, but Rook did get certain perks thanks to his status as brigage. The connection was slow, though it was still enough for him to stream video. He scoured fan sites for the clip that he was looking for.

It took Rook the better part of a half-hour but, while in poor quality, he managed to find it. The interview was in English, thankfully, with subtitles added at the bottom for an alien language that Rook didn't recognize. He pressed play and skipped forward to the part that he wanted to see, waiting impatiently for it to buffer.

 _"Is it serious, Ben?"_ The female interviewer asked, leaning in. Rook found himself mimicking her.

The camera cut to Ben and his expression had softened. " _I'm not sure,"_ he said vaguely. " _I'd like for it to be, but me and Kai haven't talked about it in a lot of detail. We're seeing how things go for now, you know? Playing it by ear."_

They continued talking, the subject of the interview switching back to Ben's new galactic headquarters, but Rook was no longer listening. He had the answer that he wanted, he just didn't know what to do with it. So Ben was dating Kai. That wasn't exactly surprising. Rook had known it was coming and that was the problem.

Even if Ben was attracted to other men, did it matter when he was destined to be with Kai?

Rook turned his computer monitor off and sat back, staring at the black screen with a frown as he thought. He knew what came next: Ben and Kai would get married and have a child. Whether they stayed married or not was up to them, but regardless…

If destiny was set in stone and the future was unchangeable, then did _any_ of it really matter? Did it matter if Rook confessed to him? He used to be worried that telling Ben that he was in love with him would ruin their friendship. But, Rook thought bitterly, he had managed to do that just fine all on his own.

Really, there was no reason to keep it a secret from Ben. He had moved on. He was probably going to be getting married in another year or two. The thought made Rook's chest seize up, like his lungs had frozen and were refusing to take in oxygen. He couldn't do anything about it, though. He wasn't going to stoop low enough to sabotage Ben's happy relationship on some minuscule chance that he might feel the same way. That was unbelievably selfish.

 _Some_ degree of selfishness, though… Well, Rook could stomach that. His mouth had gone dry. Even before he admitted it to himself, he knew what his decision was.

Clearly, bottling it up hadn't worked. Rook wanted to move on. He _needed_ to move on. It had been five years, but it was time that Ben finally knew how he felt. Regardless of the way he handled the rejection, Rook would take it. It wasn't fair to either of them.

And, all romantic feelings aside, Rook just missed his best friend.

"Brigage, I spoke to the geneticist team and wrote up a report on their latest findings like you asked," Twi'leks announced as she stepped into Rook's office. She was looking down at the papers in her hands so she hadn't noticed Rook almost fall over himself in his shock. He had forgotten how stealthy her species was. "Their findings haven't noticed any significant changes, but there have been some improvements in the offspring that— oh." She paused, looking at Rook with all three of her eyes narrowed. It was hard to tell if she was suspicious or concerned. Uxorites were hard to read. "Are you alright?"

Concerned it was, then.

Even as Rook opened his mouth to say that he was fine, more of a reflex than anything, he caught himself. Why was he bothering? She probably knew exactly what the problem was.

He stood up suddenly, coming around his desk. When Rook took the report, Twi'leks let him, her expression still crinkled up. "Thank you. I will take a look at this as soon as I return. I am using the vacation days I have saved up to take a small vacation. It should only be a few days. Magister Lekku, can you fill in for my duties as brigage while I am gone?"

Twi'leks' face twisted in confusion. "You're leaving right now?" She asked. Rook's confirmational nod only seemed to make her more upset. "We're in the middle of making some serious decisions for Vulpin. With all due respect, Brigage, you can't just…" Something occurred to her then. Twi'leks looked Rook up and down, _really_ looking at him. He averted his eyes and hoped that she couldn't tell he was turning red beneath his fur. Her eyes widened and a ghost of a smile played upon her lips. "Oh. I see."

Fighting not to squirm, Rook scowled and said, "It will only be a few days, at most. You can handle it until then. If you want that promotion to brigage, you can consider this training."

The smile on her face only grew as Twi'leks turned smug. "Yes, sir." She chuckled and walked past Rook into his office. "I'll fill out the absence papers in your steed, then. I understand that you must be in a hurry and I don't want to hold you up over formalities," she teased.

Though embarrassed, Rook was still grateful that it was going so well. He gave a brisk nod. "Excellent. If there is an emergency or a decision you are unclear on, be sure to notify me. I will have my badge on my person at all times."

Twi'leks nodded. "Hurry back, sir." She waited until Rook had turned and was already out the door before saying, "One last thing, Brigage."

There was a flicker of annoyance, but Rook bit back a sigh and turned to her. "Yes?"

Any and all impatience disappeared when Twi'leks suddenly wrapped her arms around him. The hug was made awkward by their armor, but Rook softened and held her in return, anyway. "Good luck," she muttered, so softly that Rook almost thought he had imagined it.

They held each other for a few moments, then Rook pulled back. "Thank you," he told her and was surprised to find that he meant it. It had been a while since he was that genuine.

Everything between them had already been said, so Twi'leks just saluted him and let Rook go uninterrupted. He wasn't hoping for a miracle by going to see Ben or anything, but Rook knew instinctively that he needed to do it. Running out on his job, heedless of the proper procedures, left Rook feeling giddy in a way he hadn't since he was a teenager meeting his hero for the first time.

No matter what happened once Rook arrived on Earth, he had the feeling that it would all be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you need a visual for Twi'leks, just picture Xylene from the original series. And all that stuff about Vulpin being the galaxy's dump is canon. I thought it ought to be fixed.


	2. that’s why i need you to back off (cause i can’t be close to you)

In hindsight, Rook probably should have called Ben before leaving Vulpin to see him. But, well, he had been impatient. He had already set his coordinates for Earth, but he hadn't entered faster-than-light travel just yet. He needed to make a call, first, and doing so while the FTL drive was activated was physically impossible.

Despite all the years that had passed, Rook still had easy access to Ben through his Plumber's badge. He couldn't bring himself to delete that last bit of connection between them. He kept telling himself " _just in case,"_ but up until that moment, Rook had never known what he was waiting for.

In the pilot's seat, Rook took a deep breath. His Plumber badge connected automatically to the ship's computer when he was on board, so all he had to do was select Ben's contact information. That was easy enough.

Rook spent five minutes trying to talk himself into it before he just held his breath, closed his eyes, and clicked the "call" button. The ship's cabin was filled with the sound of monotone beeping, a signal that had not yet been intercepted. His heart was in his throat. The grip that Rook had on the arms of his chair was so strong that his hands were shaking and he thought that he was going to break his armor against the metal.

Then the worst and best possible outcome happened. There was a sharp click. On Rook's main screen, a fuzzy face became visible. Ben had actually answered him.

" _Hey, Rook!"_ He greeted, voice slightly distorted but still obviously happy. " _Oh, man, it must've been… what, four years since I last heard from you? How's life been treating you, dude? It's so good to hear from you again."_

Five years and Ben didn't hold even an inkling of resentment for Rook's silent treatment. He wasn't sure if he was going to laugh or cry. Which one was more situationally appropriate?

After a moment, Rook settled on neither and managed to pull himself together. "I apologize for my absence, Ben. I have been kept very busy since my promotion to brigage." It wasn't technically a lie, yet it felt dirty in Rook's mouth all the same. He wanted to tell Ben everything, but that was definitely a conversation that they needed to have face-to-face. He managed a smile, wondering if Ben's video was clear enough for him to see how strained it was. "But I am going to be in the area for work and I was wondering if you would like to… catch up over a smoothie. I am sure that there is much to talk about."

If it was possible, Ben's smile only grew wider. " _Sure! I would love to!"_ He said, enthused. " _I gotta go right now, though. You caught me on the way to a meeting."_ Ben rolled his eyes. " _Well, "meeting" being used as the polite word for "Azmuth teleported into my galactic headquarters and has about two hours of lectures planned on why I'm going about this in the absolute worst way." He's not changed a bit."_ There was a sign, fond and reminiscent, then Ben jolted as he remembered himself. " _Sorry, got a little sidetracked. So, see you… when do you get in, tonight? How about nine at our old Mr. Smoothies? They've got a happy hour deal that ends when they close. Half off new flavors!"_ He gave a thumbs up.

Despite himself, Rook smiled. Azmuth wasn't the only one who hadn't changed much in five years, it seemed. Rook included, of course. His mouth was dry and his hands were growing sweaty in his gloves, but this was the closest Rook had been to seeing Ben in four years. He had already pushed himself too far to give up like a coward. "I will be there," he promised. "I am looking forward to it, Ben. See you then."

" _See you!"_ Ben parroted back. He shouted something over his shoulder at someone that Rook couldn't see, then the screen went black and the hum of distorted audio faded.

Rook slumped forward in his seat, holding his head in his hands. That was just a phone conversation that had lasted barely a minute and he was already exhausted. How was he going to handle lying the most vulnerable parts of himself bare?

He did his best not to think about it. The important thing was that he was seeing Ben. With any luck, seeing him would cure his little crush without any extra effort.

Yeah, right.

At any rate, there was nothing that Rook could do about it now. He had made his decision and he was going to see it through. Twi'leks had had a point, after all — Rook had chosen Ben's answer for him. He had never let him make a choice on his own.

Forcing himself to focus on something else, Rook turned to the FTL controls. He set his coordinates for just past the Kepler asteroid belt and let the ship handle the rest. Once in FTL drive, Rook felt a bit of a headrush as the stars beyond his window blurred into streaking lights, but those were the only noticeable effects. It was still another hour and a half to Earth, unfortunately, and Rook knew he was going to spend the rest of his time overthinking it all.

He sighed and stood up. There was no point waiting in the pilot's seat when the ship was only traveling in a straight line. Rook had a small, private quarter since he was flying his personal Plumber cruiser, so he decided that he might as well go lie down. With any luck, he would manage to sleep a little.

When the ship eventually eased itself out of FTL travel, Rook had gotten exactly zero sleep. He ran a hand over his face with a sigh and rolled out of bed. He shrugged his armor back on and headed for the ship's bridge.

It was stalling in space while it waited for Rook to take over the manual controls. That wasn't a good feature, normally, but Rook was flying into Earth's woefully technically incompetent airspace, which was nothing like diving headfirst into enemy fire. It would only take about ten minutes to get to Earth at his current speed, about a third of the speed of light. Rook paid vague attention to what was outside of the window, but he didn't have to. He had proximity alarms and, either way, there was only the occasional asteroid.

Since Rook wasn't giving his surroundings a lot of attention, he was surprised when he looked up at the approaching Earth and found it… surrounded. For a moment, he tensed, thinking that he was witnessing an alien invasion, but just as Rook grabbed for his weapons he realized his mistake. All of the ships were different, in size, shape, coloring, and construction. None of them were attacking. Rook watched, awed, as it finally clicked that he was witnessing commerce ships arriving and departing. Carrying goods, passengers, valuable information… Earth was globalizing and it was in the throes of a very rich trade season, it seemed.

The Plumber's station was bustling, too. It looked like rudimentary sanctions were in place. Occasionally, a ship would pull into the Plumber's docking station and others were leaving to make room for new arrivals. It was hard to manage extraterrestrial traffic, but an effort was being made.

With a registered Plumber vehicle, Rook just scanned his badge when he was prompted and was allowed to pass through without further inquiry. He missed the Proto-TRUK for a moment. He hadn't been allowed to make any modifications to a vehicle that he didn't out-right own, but at least it came with a few different forms to shift between so that he could park it comfortably on a few different worlds. A normal Earth car was one of them, thankfully.

It had a model listed next to it, but Rook didn't know anything about normal cars. If he asked Kevin, he might know. The thought made Rook smile bitterly. He hadn't talked to Gwendolyn and Kevin in almost as long as he had been avoiding Ben. He had vaguely told him that he needed space and time to himself and they had been understanding. Looking back, though, Rook felt guilt clench in his gut. He regretted the radio silence between all of them. Their little group of four had made for some of the best times in Rook's life.

He put it out of mind at least long enough to enter the atmosphere, making the necessary adjustments to land. Rook's ship did most of the work, but there were a few rough patches. Maybe he shouldn't have entered Earth's gravitational pull that quickly, but Rook was anxious and not being as attentive as he normally was.

In a hovering position high above California, Rook tapped a few choices on the screen in front of him to set his time to Earth's. His time zone was accounted for. From so high up, the sun was still clearly visible but, according to the clock, it was only two minutes until nine.

The idea of being late made Rook tense for an entirely different reason. Ben had said nine, so Rook was going to be there by nine. The length of space travel could be so finicky when it came to specifics like minutes and seconds. Still, that was no excuse for tardiness. What would his parents think?

Actually, Rook knew what they would think. They would disown him if they knew why, exactly, he had dropped work to hurry to Earth. His father wouldn't even hesitate. But though the possibility of their reactions saddened Rook, he didn't let it deter him. He had made up his mind.

He brought his cruiser down as evenly as he could, spotting an empty section of road on the outskirts of Bellwood. A neat combination of buttons killed the thrusters and had the ship's wings folding into themselves. The inconspicuous car jolted as its tires hit the ground and Rook bounced violently in his seat. He quickly applied the brakes to slow down and took the next turn going the proper speed limit, heading into Bellwood.

There were twenty-two (and sometimes twenty-three) Mr. Smoothie locations in Bellwood, but Rook knew which one Ben wanted to meet at. They had only had one that was their regular.

The drive was a vague blur but, pulling up to their meeting location, Rook felt his anxiety ebb away as fondness replaced it. He never thought that he would miss a smoothie store, but there had been a lot of good memories at that building. More than that, Rook missed the implied routine of it all. Things had been so much similar when his partnership with Ben was still new. They arrested a few criminals, shared some laughs, a few boring patrols, and got smoothies together when they were done. It wasn't the smoothies that Rook missed, though.

He missed sharing them with Ben.

As he got out of his car and made sure it was locked, Rook couldn't help but notice how many alien customers there were. He had thought that the new galactic trade features were bringing in business, but not immigrants. It was sort of weird, to see a Tetramand delicately holding a large Mr. Smoothie cup and a Geochelone Aerio fumbling for human money, but not a bad weird. Just different. Rook hid a private smile and looked around for a familiar face.

He had assumed that Ben wasn't there even before he even stepped out of the car, if only because Rook was sure there would have been a crowd otherwise. It didn't bother Rook. He was four minutes late, so it was probably better that Ben was a little behind schedule, too.

Rook stepped into line, hoping that Ben would be there by the time he got up to order. He wasn't, but that was fine, too. After a year of eating with Ben, Rook had a sense for his peculiar pallet. He ordered for the both of them, getting a vanilla smoothie for himself and a pickled plum and wheatgrass combination for Ben. It was the first weird combination that Rook's eyes fell on, but he assumed that it would be fine. He paid for them both with the digital credits on his Plumber badge, selected an empty table, and settled in to wait.

After the long rush over to Earth, Rook suddenly remembered that he hadn't eaten lunch. He had left his tray untouched back in his office on Vulpin. Despite himself, he chuckled. That wasn't like Rook. It was more similar to something that Ben would do. He eyed his smoothie thoughtfully but, after a moment, Rook adjusted both of them next to his arm and left his untouched, the straws unwrapped. The polite thing to do was wait until Ben joined him.

Slowly, the minutes ticked by. Or maybe it only felt like they passed slowly because Rook kept checking his badge for the time. A few more customers came in, then a big rush apparently making good on the happy hour discount, but by nine-thirty, no one else was showing up and the area was starting to look deserted.

Doubts trickled into Rook's mind. Had he heard the time wrong? Was he in the wrong location? Did Ben mean to meet the following day? He thought about calling just to verify, but the last thing that Rook needed was to look desperate. Stubbornly, he waited.

The high schooler getting paid minimum wage to make smoothies had already closed the front of the shop, exiting out the back and most likely heading home. Above Rook, the beacon-like Mr. Smoothie mascot flickered and turned off. The soft humming of its light was cut and Rook found himself in silent darkness, still tapping his fingers idly on the table. The last of the evening's patrons took the hint, gathered up their things, and left.

Ben being late wasn't surprising. Even after so many years, some things never changed.

Still, Rook waited. He was wondering how long he would wait for (had he not already waited five years?) but thankfully, that wasn't a question that Rook needed to answer. It was nearly ten-thirty when he felt a burst of air from behind him and heard the flapping of wings. Rook was half out of his seat, hand automatically going to his Proto-Tool, but there was no need. A flash of green light calmed Rook instantly, just in time for his heart rate to pick right back up when Ben Tennyson dropped to the ground next to him.

"Hey, Rook," Ben said, completely casual. "You ordered for us? Good thing you're already prepared. Listen, I'm so sorry about being late. I wasn't watching the time and then when I went to leave headquarters, I got blasted by some escaped prisoners. Wrangling them took way too long. Sorry again. I just don't want you to think that I was blowing you off or anything." He paused, then frowned. "You're not mad are you, dude? You're sort of staring."

And, yes, Rook was staring, but not because he was angry. The lighting was dim, coming from the buildings around them and passing cars and the half-moon, but it was enough. Rook was soaking in all the differences, all the details that he couldn't see in the video.

Even if Ben was still just wearing a t-shirt, jacket, and jeans, he looked like a completely different person. Ben had let his hair grow out, brushing down around his shoulders. Some of it was tied back, out of his face. He could see the beginnings of Ben 10,000 in the confident set of Ben's shoulders, the more developed jaw, the stubble growing, and the muscles that were developing. The last time Rook had seen him, Ben came up to the middle of his chest. Now he was at Rook's chin and still growing, it looked like.

Despite himself, Rook felt his face growing hot. He wasn't one for judging based on physical appearance but, well, as much as he had liked Ben before, Rook was grateful that he was a late bloomer.

"No," he said finally, averting his eyes. "No, I am not angry with you. I understand."

It was so easy to please Ben. He immediately relaxed and nodded, as if he didn't have a care in the world when Rook knew that such an assumption couldn't be further from the truth. "That's a relief. I think we have enough to talk about without spending a bunch of time on apologies." Ben wrapped his arms around Rook in a brief hug and pulled back before the contact could really be appreciated. He reached around Rook to grab both smoothies, handing the vanilla one to Rook. "Good thing we met at night, so these weren't sitting out in the sun," he remarked, sipping his experimentally. "Wow, these are really good. Do you wanna walk while we talk, Rook? I know some parks that are still lit up this late so we don't have to loiter in the Mr. Smoothie parking lot."

There were a lot of words there to unpack, most of which Rook wasn't listening to. He nodded anyway. "Sure. A walk sounds… nice." A lot of things sounded nice right about then. Rook felt like he was going to throw up. How was he going to tell Ben anything important when he could barely spit out five words at a time?

Ben smiled (and no matter how many times it made Rook's heart seize up, he couldn't bring himself to hate that smile) and gestured for Rook to follow him. They crossed the street, then Ben settled into a more leisurely walk with one hand in his pocket as he continued slurping down his smoothie. Rook didn't think he could handle his. "I heard through the grapevine that you got promoted," he said after a minute of silence. "What's it like, being a brigage?"

That was something mundane to talk about. Rook could manage that. He took a deep breath. "It is mostly boring. A lot of paperwork," he sighed. "It is nothing like being in the field. I am in charge of an entire planet, but it is a lot of responsibility. Many things can go wrong and I will assuredly be blamed for all of them." Rook tried not to sound bitter, but he didn't think that he did a very good job.

"You're telling me." Ben rolled his eyes. "Things on Earth haven't changed much. Well, we have more aliens hanging around, so there's been some more crime, but I don't handle that stuff anymore. The Plumbers kept their big base in space and set up a bunch of teleporters all over the world so they can manage the petty criminals."

Rook blinked in surprise. "What do you mean that you do not handle those sorts of minor crimes anymore?"

"You said it yourself, dude," Ben answered with a one-armed shrug. "They're minor. Anyone can shoot at a guy running away with an old woman's purse and slap cuffs on him. I did a lot of thinking after everything that happened. Y'know… with Petropia." He was holding his smoothie in his right hand. The left one — the hand with the Omnitrix, the hand that was _damaged_ — Ben kept in his jacket pocket. "I can be doing so much good on way bigger scales. I started building my galactic headquarters specifically for that. So I can still be close to Earth while I work harder on taking care of the entire galaxy. I don't want to waste time with the small-timers anymore, Rook. Stopping wars, making sure everyone is being treated fairly, fixing poverty and hunger on a _galaxy-wide_ scale… That's where me and the Omnitrix can do the most good."

Abruptly, Rook stopped walking. It took Ben a few seconds to realize what had happened, but then he stopped too and turned to face Rook. He looked a little confused, but mostly determined. Rook had seen Ben like that before, when he got a fiery passion that burned hotter than stars, but he had never seen Ben like that just from talking.

There was a soft chuckle. Rook took a sip from his smoothie, finally, hiding his smile. "You have changed a lot. That is an admirable goal, Ben."

When he started walking again, Ben started up too, laughing. "I know. It's stressful, but also more satisfying, I think. I can finally save the day without punching people or breaking stuff. And since I'm not technically a Plumber, everyone sort of tends to trust me easier," he explained.

"You officially retired?" Rook asked, taken aback. Ben's status with the Plumbers had always been dubious, so it was interesting to hear that he had finally made a decision on that front. When Ben nodded, Rook hummed in faint interest and continued, "Does that not place a lot of your actions into uncertain legality?"

Ben snorted. "Maybe, but what are the Plumbers going to do? Arrest me for stopping wars? I still usually side with them, but it's easier to work on my own. I don't have all of that asking for permission or worrying about the procedures or the nightmare of bureaucracy. Plus, I was never really the officer type." He tossed his empty smoothie cup underhand and it bounced off of the rim off a nearby trashcan and tumbled in.

"Let me guess," Rook teased, pretending to think. "You are more of the hero type?"

"Yeah, dude, exactly!" Ben agreed with an enthusiastic nod. He was smiling at Rook again. Did Ben mean for his expression to look that soft and fond, or was Rook imagining it?

He managed to return the smile back, feeling something in his chest ache. As they passed the trash can and turned into the park, Rook dropped his full cup into it without fanfare. He wished that he had made the choice, once upon a time, to be a hero like Ben. He wished that he could reserve that smile only for himself.

"This park is pretty small," Ben was saying when Rook tuned back in, "but it has some nice paths for walks and a fountain in the middle that people throw coins into."

Rook tried to lose himself in the conversation again. He had been doing so well until Ben smiled at him. "Why would people throw money into a stagnant body of water? That seems rather wasteful."

For some reason, that made Ben laugh, even though Rook hadn't been joking. Maybe it was another human culture thing that he was missing.

"It's just for fun," Ben said. "It doesn't have to be beneficial to anyone except you. See, you throw a coin in and you make a wish, then the wish is supposed to come true. Or it gives you good luck, something like that. It's not important. What _is_ important—" He was talking a mile a minute and suddenly stopped walking, jabbing Rook in the chest with his finger, all while sporting the biggest grin. Rook hated how much he loved it. He hated that he loved the way Ben's eyes lit up. Had he really gone five years without seeing his best friend this happy? "—is that the fountain is right up ahead and I'm going to race you. Last one there is a rotten egg!"

While Rook was still distracted, Ben smacked him on the shoulder and took off into the park. Rook sputtered in protest, trying to get some traction with his thoughts. He couldn't even remember what Ben had said or why they were suddenly running, but he didn't hesitate to follow. "You should not be running in the dark!" He tried a weak protest, then Rook let himself be lost in the sound of Ben's laughter and the rush of adrenaline as he pumped his legs.

It seemed like all he ever did was chase after Ben. Nothing had changed.

"Who are you, my mom?" Ben shot back over his shoulder. He quieted as Rook caught up, letting out a sharp laugh and laying on another burst of speed.

Rook didn't even know where they were going, but he wasn't going to get there last. He ran as hard as he could, passing Ben and nearly tripping over himself when he had to come to a fast stop.

He was vaguely sure that he was supposed to be racing to a fountain, so Rook put his hand on the stone encircling the base, keeping the water in. It was a delicate feature, big enough to drive a small car in the basin, with water features that came shooting off of sweeping arches of carved leaves and vines and flowers. In the center was a woman looking out lovingly at the park goers — not a stitch of stone-clothing to be seen — but who was tastefully hidden behind the grey foliage.

Turning back to Ben, Rook grinned in triumph. "I believe that means I won," he said smugly, not the least bit winded.

Ben laughed breathlessly, making Rook's stomach flip. He jogged the rest of the distance and stopped in front of Rook, panting. "You cheated," he protested, but the grin on his face was threatening to split his face. "You and those stupidly long legs of yours. What are they, like, three-quarters of your height?"

"Five-eighths, actually," Rook quipped back. He folded his arms over his chest, one brow raised in amusement. "You should not make challenges that you cannot best, Ben. Let this be a lesson in— ah!"

His taunt was cut off when Ben planted both hands on Rook's chest and pushed with a grunt. Surprised, Rook's knees caught on the edge of the fountain and he tumbled backward into the frigid water. It wasn't deep enough for Rook to be submerged, but he still gasped when he felt the unpleasant cold trickle beneath his Proto-Armor.

When he looked up at Ben, he was holding something. Rook squinted in the dark, but then Ben tossed the little object. There was a glint of light as the metal caught the moon's glow, right before the quarter landed in the water next to Rook with a soft plop and sank.

"Well, I got what I wished for," Ben joked. He set one knee on the edge of the fountain and leaned over, offering Rook his hand. He was still smiling. Rook never wanted him to stop. "Need some help up?"

Rook took his hand but, instead of standing, he smirked and yanked down instead. Ben was knocked off-balance with a yelp and went crashing into Rook, half on top of him and half in the water. "It is not pleasant, is it?" Rook shot at him, flicking water into Ben's face.

"And here I was thinking that you were an adult now!" Ben accused. He laughed and splashed water at Rook, but they were so close that Ben ended up getting half of it on himself.

He pushed himself up and off of Rook, kneeling in the water next to him and still laughing like he didn't know how to stop. Rook ended up joining in. It had been a while since he felt so… relaxed. Was it really so easy? Had Rook been worrying himself over nothing?

And like that, it all really did feel simple. Ben was right there. Rook was with him. It had been years, but everything between them felt so natural.

All Rook knew was that, dripping with water and looking so happy, Ben was ethereal in the moonlight. Rook wanted to kiss him more than he had ever wanted anything. So he put a hand on Ben's shoulder, pulled him in, and just did it.

Ben's lips were soft and dry, still a little chilled from his smoothie. His breath hitched against Rook's mouth as he brought a hand up to cup Ben's cheek, fingers stroking a spot behind his jaw that made him gasp lowly. Ben lifted his hands, settling them on Rook's chest as though he couldn't decide between pushing away or pulling closer.

He didn't kiss back, but he didn't pull away, either. It felt like Ben didn't know what to do or think. After a moment, Rook pulled back to look at Ben. He wasn't smiling anymore.

"What," Ben managed. He worked his mouth a few times, stunned, and Rook felt his shaky breath against his lips. "What was that for?"

His tone wasn't hopeful or fond. Ben sounded scared, almost. Rook frowned and moved back to give Ben some space, dropping his hands. "I… I was…" He was the one at a loss for words then. He quieted himself and, when Rook did speak, he said each word slowly and deliberately. "I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable, Ben. I love… I am in love with you. I have been since Petropia." The ease from before was gone. All Rook felt was the cold seeping in — under his armor, under his skin, into his soul. He looked away. "I thought that you should know."

The longer Ben went without saying something, the worse Rook felt. He didn't dare risk glancing up at Ben's expression. He was terrified of Ben's response. What if he hated Rook? What if he felt the same way?

Could it always be that easy? As easy as smoothies and running through the park like children and kissing sometimes? Rook wanted it to be. The stab of longing made him want to claw his chest open.

"I…" Ben sighed and stood up. Instead of leaving, as Rook was convinced he was about to do, Ben reached down and offered Rook his hand again. That time, he took it without any amusement and let Ben help him out of the water.

Soaking wet, they both sat on the edge of the fountain facing away from each other. Ben cleared his throat and, if only out of politeness, Rook glanced over at him. "I would be lying if I said I never thought about it," he said evenly. His face had gone red. "Not you, specifically, but… guys. I mean, I've never tried dating another man, but I think I'd be willing to. I like girls, obviously, and it's not like I— But I mean I—" He cut himself off with a groan and dragged a hand over his face. "Look, that's beside the point. I just don't want you to think that I'm mad at you because of _that_. But whatever I'm into isn't the point. I…" Ben shook his head. "Rook, I have a girlfriend. And this… this is just confusing me even more."

Rook turned to face Ben properly, frowning. "Confusing how?" He pressed. Was Ben saying what Rook thought he was saying, or…?

"I don't know!" Ben snapped, annoyed, but Rook got the feeling that the frustration wasn't directed at him. "Things between us were always really nice. I've missed you so much since you stopped talking to me, you know that? You were my best friend. And with you gone and Gwen and Kevin off together, and Kai, y'know, _available_ …" He gestured around them unhappily. "I can't be like this with her. She wants me to be an adult, which isn't unreasonable, but between that and getting my galactic headquarters up and running, and all these new villains I have to deal with, the politics of making myself into an ambassador, I just— I really needed this, Rook, but I don't need the weird feelings between us. I want something easy right now. You know?" Ben looked up at him, eyes searching. He froze when Rook brushed the back of his hand over his cheek.

They kissed again. Rook moved closer, pulling him in. All he could focus on was how Ben hadn't rejected him. He had felt it too, how easy it was, and Rook wanted to show him that it could _always_ be this easy. If he wasn't happy with Kai, he didn't have to be with her. Why didn't Ben see that? There were other options. Rook wanted to see Ben so happy every day for the rest of his life. Couldn't that be something he could pick? Something that they could try?

The second time, Ben kissed back and stopped himself. He was torn, more obviously. His hand hovered between them, unsure if he should touch Rook's face or his shoulder or his arm. He didn't know what he wanted, but how could he if he hadn't explored both options? Rook brushed his thumb along Ben's jaw, sliding his hand into Ben's hair and cupping his head. He wished that Ben could just be decisive for once.

He made up his mind when Rook's other hand brushed his waist. Ben suddenly pushed himself away, hard, stumbling to his feet and nearly tripping over himself in the process. He glared at Rook, his eyes as heated as his face, and wiped his mouth with the back of his sleeve.

"I just said I was confused!" Ben snapped, causing Rook to wince. "That wasn't an invitation for you to make it _worse_!"

He was on his feet quickly as well, hands held up in surrender. "I am sorry—" he tried. Rook stepped closer, wanting to be comforting, but stopped himself when Ben took another step back and vehemently shook his head.

"No, you're not fucking sorry! If you were sorry, you wouldn't have ignored everything I just told you and kissed me again anyway!" Ben forcibly quieted himself, taking a few deep breaths to try and control his anger.

Waiting, Rook said nothing. He had never felt more ashamed in his life. Well, he had once before, but Petropia was far, far away from that brisk evening in Bellwood.

"You know what you are?" The anger was gone. Ben looked at Rook with such profound sadness that he immediately wished to have the fury back. He could take Ben being mad. Rook would rather Ben hate him than look at him like _that_. "You're selfish. You cut me out of your life for five years because you hated the way you felt, and now that you accept it, you think that I should accept you right back. You act like, after the way you treated me, we can just go back to how things have always been. Well, I _tried_ , Rook."

Ben held up his Omnitrix arm, the one with the blue-ish hue to the skin and jagged bumps running from the tips of his fingers to his elbow. The injury that even Azmuth hadn't been able to reverse — not without growing Ben a new arm from stem cells dug out of his bone marrow. The injury that Rook had always blamed himself for. He recoiled at the sight.

"After everything on Petropia, I tried to forgive you," he continued, "and I was so ready to forget it all and start over. Don't forget that, Rook. _You_ were the one that pushed me away. _You_ cut me out. And you still feel like you have a right to be in my life." Ben lowered his arm, suddenly looking exhausted. "I have to go get some sleep so I'm ready for my breakfast date with Kai tomorrow. She's not perfect, Rook, but if there's one thing I can say, it's that at least she was there for me when you weren't." He sniffed and wiped his face with his damp jacket sleeve. "I think that you should go."

Rook felt the emotion drain out of him. His face was devoid of expression when he nodded. "Okay." A pause. "I'm sorry," he said, because that was the only thing that seemed appropriate and it still wasn't enough. Ben rolled his eyes and Rook didn't react.

He didn't move for a long time. Not until after Ben had turned away from him and there was a flash of green light. Not until after his silhouetted alien form disappeared against the horizon. Not until after the water had dried and all Rook felt was cold, cold, cold.

He took a deep breath and turned around, forcing himself to start walking back to where he left his ship by the Mr. Smoothie. What else was he supposed to do?

Well, he had a few days of break left. Maybe Rook would swing by Revonnah and congratulate Shim on her engagement and finally meet her future husband. Drowning himself in someone else's happiness sounded absolutely _perfect_. He felt a tear run down his face and ignored it.

Later, Rook would break down. He would cry and refuse to leave his room and hate himself to the core of his being for single-handedly ruining the best thing in his life. But that was for another day.

At least the trip to Earth hadn't been a total waste. After all, Rook finally knew Ben's definitive answer.

He just hadn't anticipated what he would do if it was "no."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am incapable of feeling joy or sympathy. Thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> I also have a Tumblr **[HERE](https://karkalicious769.tumblr.com/)** featuring some other links if you guys want to support my writing!


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